The Essential Essence of Wintering
It’s 3 am, I am waking up early in San Diego, CA to catch my flight. I am headed to Big Sky Montana for a Holistic Emotional First Aid Training. I have some understanding of what’s to come, as I am a therapist and a Wilderness First Responder, but my mind wanders with ideas, anxieties and perceptions of what is to come.
As I double check my packing list, I re-read “ bring warm layers and big jackets” as I sit in my living room in flip flops, and I think to myself “what does negative 9 even feel like?”. I pack layers, but keep it light, “it’s only a weekend”, I think to say to my partner as I packed for the third time. My partner asks “And what is it you're doing again?”. I think about that for a while as I cross the airport security, make it to my gate and fly to Bozeman. I have been known to be the type of person to jump in with both feet. From living aboard, or moving across the country, these are things I tend to believe that you have to just trust the process, there is always a lesson on the other side. This experience was nothing like I expected but everything I didn’t know I needed.
I had heard of Shakti Rising before, their name had come up before from working with Groundswell Community Project as a main partner. Shakti Rising offers powerful frameworks for lived liberation in a safe, women-centered environment. Creatively distinct, invitingly irreverent, pragmatically mystical, somatic, and trauma-informed, our programs help women remember themselves home so they can show up for their lives and big work in the world. Little did I know that at the time, these women would leave a big impact on me.
I arrive at the training and boy oh boy, 9 degrees is as cold as you think it is. We enter into a small conference room full of chairs, cushions, things to draw with, write with, color with, different drinks, teas, coffees, snacks. You immediately feel this sense of bounty. All my bases are covered, all these pieces here will help my needs be met. And then the two main presenters start their speech on wintering. Shannon and Christie playfully bounce off each other, meeting each other with only the respect that 25 years of teaching together would bring. Filling in where the other left off, weaving in and out of each other as if they are singing a song. And I was there jaw dropping, ready to pick up the lyrics to this new song.
The theme of this song was wintering. We start off by discussing what it means to us. As a San Diego local, I was confused by the concept of winter. We often find ourselves in the same season, which makes the days pass faster than where I grew up on the east coast and had a winter to separate the days. I listened to the Montana Locals talk about struggle and anchoring within the seasons. Shannon shared snow can become that protection of our own soil, as the temperatures drop. I thought to myself like right now hey? As I sit in my winter coat still inside the room.
As therapists and humans of the year 2023, we often find ourselves in burn out, before we might even recognize we are there. The systems around us tell us to work harder for earned vacation time, work from home when you are sick instead of taking a day off or to have paid time off to mourn the loss of the loved one but only for 3 days. We are honored for pushing through and having resilience, when maybe we shouldn’t even “have to be that resilient in the first place”.
As therapists, we are the highest leading field when it comes to burnout. When we go to school, they say this statistic, yet then we do unpaid internships and after take on 25 clients to make up for the shortage of us out there. The beauty of this training is that we can provide Holistic Emotional First Aid to make up for where not all therapy can reach. HEFA is for the lay responder and anyone can do it! (Even you reading).
I was sold. Training that everyone can provide like CPR First Aid? This seemed like a no brainer, a space for all to learn how to provide care and valuing mental health at the same level as physical health. As I looked around the training room, I saw the beautiful faces of caring teachers, ski lift workers, restaurant owners, students of the local high school, yoga teachers all in this community of Big Sky Montana that would be able to provide this care to their community. HEFA is the emergency room for emotions and these humans would provide that care. My heart filled as I thought of the impact in numbers that these fifteen people would provide. Community healing. The power that would spread among all they encountered and the possibility to reduce burn out for themselves and those around them.
We finished the first day of training and my notebook was 12 pages full. Knowledge of community healing sang out Shannon and Chrisites mouth because this is a tune they have memorized. Beautifully crafted stories and tools to provide care.
As I entered the classroom on the second day, I was excited to learn more. Shannon shared a personal story of impact that shook me to the core around her transformation in this field then shared a quote that I now have written on my bathroom mirror. Transform yourself to transform the world. This is the key thread to this training, this blog and to Holistic Emotional First Aid, if we want to stop burn out, want to help others, we must help ourselves first. Fill our own cup, to fill others. We hear these narratives often of self care, selling the products of face masks and massages, but often they work for a day or a week, maybe a month if we’re lucky then we're back searching for me.
Holistic Emotional First Aid Training taught me tangible tools in my tool box for nervous system fluency and regulation. The key with using these tools is to track: practice, notice and reflect. These tools I can now use for myself and then use to support others. Transform myself to transform the world.
If you got this far, I invite you to embrace the unknown like I did when I flew on the plane not knowing what to expect flying to Montana for the first time. Like me, you might start to sing the song of community healing. Here’s the challenge: Track your nervous system for one week. Take one breathing exercise (box breathing, Nostril breathing, Salamander, figure eight breathe etc) per day. And just notice, track, and reflect.
If you enjoyed this blog and are interested to learn more, check out our Surf Therapy Sessions at Groundswell Community Project and Salt of the Earth Training by Shakti Rising.
Written by Meg Maring AMFT, Groundswell Community Project Community Partnership Manager and Surf Therapy Facilitator
